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厄尔（克林特·伊斯特伍德 Clint Eastwood 饰）是一名独居的八旬老人，正在面临非常严峻的财务危机，他唯一的住所即将被拍卖用来抵扣债务，在这个节骨眼上，厄尔得到了一份司机的工作，但厄尔所要运送的却并非什么乘客，而是毒品。就这样，厄尔成为了墨西哥贩毒集团中的一员。报告老板！第一季如果我是路易莎·松莎我知道你是谁第一季英雄三国志战火遗孤幻想游戏淑女伊芙申纪兰费里亚：至暗之光夜色 夜色版幸运钥匙扎帕明堂一起同过窗第二季国家淫才列奥纳多·达·芬奇 第一季第四面墙刻在你心底的名字(2020)有点心机又如何鱼之恋两个灵魂两种爱佛系养生闺女吴昕金玉良言收集2021我们善熙飞越谜情国语冒牌帝国第一季我的疯狂圣诞战斗少女激战柏林雪季过客爱情神灯我的六次元男友脱口秀大会第五季铁拳男人我，神龙之后动态漫画Play U第二季美丽小渔村处女情缘第一季真爱百分百北京爱情故事红樱剑凶煞吉时
厄尔（克林特·伊斯特伍德 Clint Eastwood 饰）是一名独居的八旬老人，正在面临非常严峻的财务危机，他唯一的住所即将被拍卖用来抵扣债务，在这个节骨眼上，厄尔得到了一份司机的工作，但厄尔所要运送的却并非什么乘客，而是毒品。就这样，厄尔成为了墨西哥贩毒集团中的一员。报告老板！第一季如果我是路易莎·松莎我知道你是谁第一季英雄三国志战火遗孤幻想游戏淑女伊芙申纪兰费里亚：至暗之光夜色 夜色版幸运钥匙扎帕明堂一起同过窗第二季国家淫才列奥纳多·达·芬奇 第一季第四面墙刻在你心底的名字(2020)有点心机又如何鱼之恋两个灵魂两种爱佛系养生闺女吴昕金玉良言收集2021我们善熙飞越谜情国语冒牌帝国第一季我的疯狂圣诞战斗少女激战柏林雪季过客爱情神灯我的六次元男友脱口秀大会第五季铁拳男人我，神龙之后动态漫画Play U第二季美丽小渔村处女情缘第一季真爱百分百北京爱情故事红樱剑凶煞吉时
长篇影评
1 ) 强烈推荐，太好笑了...
故事讲述了七十年代各个国家的外国人学英语的故事，涉及各种谐音梗、口音梗、宗教梗、政治梗...
虽然现在看来有些已经落伍，但胜在本剧的情节设置非常巧妙，经常是反转、反转、加反转，因此放到现在依然经典。
首先是巴基斯坦的阿里前来报名学英语，他一开口就踩雷了，最基础的那种。
校长显然对此早已见怪不怪，立刻明白了意思，逐字逐句指导他前往教室等候。
但她忘了，要是能听懂谁还学英语！
所以，她只好用最简单的句子非常缓慢的再说一次，
没想到，眼看就要成功了，却毁在了“right”这个单词上。
好不容易成功后，心脏强大的校长明白这一届学生和之前的没什么不同，她暗暗期待新来的老师是个有毅力的女老师。
因为上学期的男老师只干一个月就受不了，精神错乱从教室窗口爬了出去...
然而新来的老师是人暖心善、温柔可萌、对自己非常有信心的布朗老师。
做好一切准备的布朗老师信心十足踏入了教室。
但刚开口介绍自己，就被学生阿里纠错，好在校长提前打了预防针，一切都在承受范围之内。
接下来开始登记点名，如果问布朗老师人生中最感到崩溃的时刻是什么？
我想他一定会回答，点名登记这一刻。
希腊人马科斯冗长的名字让他头大；
意大利人乔瓦尼不标准的口音使得他消耗无数个脑细胞；
不过这些都算好的，对比接下来的挑战简直太好了。
印度人杰米拉一开口仿佛在说外星语，完全听不懂；好在布朗老师灵机一动，听不懂没关系，那写总成了？
不成，因为文字也是天书，一点也看不懂！
而且短短几分钟的时间，他听力也下降了。
当印度人辛格说他信仰锡克教时，他听成人家生病了。
口音问题只是非常小的一方面，还有令人头疼的种族和宗教。
德国人安娜和日本人长济太郎互争自己国家才是最有效率的民族；
而巴基斯坦的阿里和印度的辛格一开口就是嘲讽对方，要不是有人拉着，他俩绝对能打上一架。
本以为这些够糟心了，校长又给扎了一针，说这些都不是麻烦的，最麻烦的是外国美女产生的。
话刚落地，法国的丹妮尔便来了。
她刚一来，意大利人、西班牙人和希腊人便拥簇上去。
而且在今后的时间，我们的布朗老师将被各种撩。
有口头撩，
故意撩，
行为撩，等等。
总之，各个国家口音互相交织，戏剧冲突一层接着一层，所产生的喜剧效果放到现在，也仍旧值得玩味。
里面的大多数角色虽是故意扮蠢，但是由于演员的表演能力以及情节的渲染，浮夸中反而更显得好笑且萌。
不像有些剧，明明是扮萌，却让观众觉得既蠢又尴尬。
比如一次，校长告诉布朗老师，有个非洲学生要过来，另外有督察员要来考察。
就像大家猜到的那样，布朗老师成功将人物弄混了。
而且当着对方的面，直白批评对方。
但当最后揭示身份时，你以为督察员要给差评时，对方却说自己太高兴了，毫不吝啬对其进行夸赞。
换成一般喜剧，到这就完了，但这部剧的反转总是多了一层。
当布朗老师从校长那里知道来的将是女学生时，走进教室，果然有个黑人女生。
之前悬着的心立刻放下来了，立刻告诉对方自己方才的神奇经历。
但说着说着，发现对方比自己还了解督察员，甚至还知道他的名字。
一问，刚放下的心又开始悬着了。
在这部剧中，搞笑之余我们能看到各种英语学习的遇到的问题。
口音有很大问题的希腊人学习发音时，吐槽英语的发音复杂。
完全不会、放弃回答问题的西班牙人，却运气爆表，误打误撞说对了。
为了应付模拟考、让这门课程不被夭折，老师帮学生作弊，到最后却发现抄的答案是前年的！
但当你以为全完蛋时，学生的成绩却出奇的好...
由于年代关系，此剧虽然不乏当时英国人对各个国家的刻板印象，
像是法国女学生总是整天幻想勾引老师，印度和巴基斯坦的学生总是为各种的宗教起冲突，而中国学生毛爷爷的语录随口张来...
但即便存有这些，此剧仍旧经典，
因为编剧并未将屏幕前的观众当成肤浅和愚蠢之人，里面台词和角色的刻画都值得推敲细品。
比如在老师认错父母的那一集中，结合主演现实中令人唏嘘不已的命运，明明是喜剧表演，却看着看着让人难过。
要让观众在一集接着一集的情节中不感到厌烦是很艰难的，但此剧完全做到了。
有时会讶异编剧对语言学习过程中的深刻洞察，以及喜剧创作力的才思泉涌。
总而言之，看这部剧笑就完事了。
微信搜索添加公众号：美剧院线
不知道看什么优质英美剧，来这里就对了
2 ) 俚语 | 由dogs引发的一件公案
无意中见到的一个句子，令我回忆起“请讲普通话”中Sid最爱用的那些俚语。
做听写时发现一个熟悉的用法
My feet are killing me.
之前见过的类似表达是：My dogs are killing me.
▲成寒《躺着学英语2》
文中提示，dogs即是“脚”的俚语。
但是，dogs和feet究竟有什么关系，它怎么就成了“脚”的俚语了？
▍首先查询俚语词典Urban Dictionary，可以找到这个条目：
▲Urban Dictionary
dogs可以指“a person's feet”，可还是没有说明缘由。
▍接着查询词源网站Online Etymology Dictionary：
▲Online Etymology Dictionary
此时终于有了一点头绪，“feet”，from rhyming slang dog's meat.
▍什么是rhyming slang呢？来看维基百科的解释：
Rhyming slang is a form of slang word construction in the English language that uses rhyme. It is especially prevalent in the UK, Ireland, Australia and New Zealand. It started in the early 19th century in the East End of London; hence its alternative name, Cockney rhyming slang. In America, it is used in the underworld, where it is known as Australian slang. The construction of rhyming slang involves replacing a common word with a phrase of two or three words, the last of which rhymes with the original word; then, in almost all cases, omitting, from the end of the phrase, the secondary rhyming word (which is thereafter implied), making the origin and meaning of the phrase elusive to listeners not in the know. ——Wikipedia
这里还有一个简明易懂的rhyming slang示例：
The form that is followed is made clear with the following example. The rhyming phrase"apples and pears" evolved to mean "stairs". Following the pattern of omission, "and pears" is dropped, thus the spoken phrase "I'm going up the apples" means "I'm going up the stairs". ——Wikipedia
▍更多关于rhyming slang的故事和例子，可以在以下网站找到：
http://www.cockneyrhymingslang.co.uk/ http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/cockney-rhyming-slang.html //www.le.ac.uk/ee/glossaries/2008/cockney/index.html
其中第一个网站十分可爱有趣，里面还有一个Cockney translator的小工具。
▍发现rhyming slang通常是指Cockney rhyming slang之后，我马上想起了这部英剧Mind Your Language，该剧讲述的是一群异国学生在伦敦某学校学习英语的喜剧故事。剧中有一个看门人Sid，他在剧中经常使用这种rhyming slang，使得在这个学校学习英语的各国学生摸不着头脑，不明白Sid在说什么。
▲Mind Your Language S01E04
学校的英语老师Mr. Brown不得不给大家解释：
▲Mind Your Language S01E04
没错，看门人Sid告诉我们，plates of meat可以指“feet”。那么dog's meat呢？
▍查询维基词典，可以发现用dog's meat表示feet的说法是真实存在的：
▲Wiktionary
在Londontopia网站上，也有一篇文章Language: Top 100 Cockney Rhyming Slang Words and Phrases，列出了一些相似的Cockney rhyming slang，同样出现了dog's meat和feet：
▲Londontopia
回到最初，My feet/ dogsare killing me. 从feet到dogs，再到dog's meat，这部剧带给观众的乐趣，不仅在剧中，也在剧外。
— END —
3 ) 请讲普通话第一季部分摘录
Mind your language S1E1
Ali:I am not going where I am looking.
Mr.Brown: No,no! I wasn't looking where I was going.
Ali: That makes the two of us!
Miss Countney: This is not unsatisfactory! This won't do at all.
I distinctly requested the Local Authority to send me a woman
teacher. Especially after the unfortunate incident involving Mr.
Warburton. I'm afraid he only lasted a month, then he departed.
Mr.Brown: Dead?
Miss Countney: Demented. Yes, the strain was too much for him.
Typical of the male sex! No stamina.
Mr.Brown: I'm Brown.
Ali: Oh no. You are committing a mistake.
Mr.Brown: Mistake?
Ali: Yes, you are not brown! We are brown! You are white.
Mr.Brown: My name is Brown! I'm your teacher.
Mr.Brown: What is your job?
Ranjeet: I'm a very important member of the British underground.
Mr.Brown: The underground what?
Ranjeet: Just the underground. Mind the doors.
Mr.Brown: Oh that underground.(=subway地铁)
Mr.Brown: Apart from one attempted murder and a possible race riot,
I think we're coping reasonably well.
Miss Countney: Well, we have one thing to be grateful for anyway.
Sex won't be rearing its ugly little head.
From past experience, it isn't race or religion that causes problems,
it's usually the presence of some foreign beauty. Jealousies,
intrigues, all sort of thing.
Giovanni: I never notice. You see its my eyes! I'm a little short
sighted. (And also a much big liar.) It's not true. Mr. Green.
Mr.Brown: The name is Brown.
Giovanni: You see! I'm a colour blind as well.
Ali: And you are asking for a kick up your big brown backside?
Su-lee: It is duty of every citizen to overthrow imperial warmongers.
So say Chairman Mao.
Mr. Brown: Ali. You are...
Ali: You are waiting for mu to speak an answer.
Mr. Brown: Well done.
Ali: Unfortunately, I am not understanding the question.
Mr. Brown: I want you to give me a sentence using 'You are...'
Ali: I am.
Mr. Brown: No, not 'I am', 'You are'! For example, you are from
Pakistan.
Ali: I am from Pakistan.
Mr. Brown: Yes, but now use 'You are'.
Ali: But I cannot say you are from Pakistan, because you are not, are
you?
Mr. Brown: Repeat after me. You are English.
Ali: No, I'm not! I'm from Pakistan. You are confusing me.
Ranjeet: You are stupid poof.
Ali: Don't you call me poof.
Ranjeet: Poof.
Miss Countney: Job getting you down already?
Mr. Brown: No, no, I'm fine! Never felt better. There's just one thing
rough. That window you nailed down! I think I ought to put a few more
nails in it.
Mind your language S1E2 An inspector calls
Juan: Por favor?
Miss Countney: Are you really as stupid as you look?
Juan: Por favor?
Mr. Brown: So we appear to be some missing, I hope they haven't
dropped out.
Ali: Please, it would notbe surprising me, I am always thinking that
Sikh, son of Guru, was a Punjabi drop out.(laugh at Ranjeet)
Ranjeet: I'm hearing what you are saying, you miserable spawn of a
jackal!
Mr. Brown: Don't you two start again! Actually, you are late.
Ranjeet: A thousand apologies for this unforgivalbe tardinees. But we
were all unavoidably detaained in the corridor by a lady...Sorry I forget
about her name. She was big lady, very large bosoms!
Su-lee: England is becoming more porriticarry minded, and gladually
more left wing.The overthrow of decadent capitaristic goverment will
soon take place. As working classes become more educated. And
embrace Communism as the true way of life. Workers revolution
getting nearer. With inevitabel collapse of Imperiaistic bougoise
intellectual society.
Mr. Brown: Yes! Well if thats what you like about England. I wouldn't
want to hear what you didn't like.
Taro: Excuse please. May I have small observations on young lady's
discourse, which will also irrustrate increased knowledge of English.
Young lady speak road of cobras!
Su-lee: Attitude typical of Fascist Nipponese!
Taro: Japan civilised country,not like China Ren by peasant.
Su-lee: Chinese not peasants!
Taro: Japanese not Fascist!.......I lose face, not my fault!
Mr. Brown: Never mind whose fault it was! Go and apologize!
Miss Countney: It has taken you 2 min 38 sec exactly to come to my
office immediately. I'm glad I didn't ask you to take your time.
Max: Danielle, what you do after class?
Danielle: I go back home to learn the English.
Giovanni: Hey, I'm going to learn English as well. Maybe we learn
together.
Danielle: Yes but what about poor Max?
Max: Yeah.
Giovanni: What about the poor Max? I'm crying my eyes out.
Danielle: I have an idea.
Giovanni: I have a lot of ideas.
Danielle: Why not you and Max study together?
Mr. Brown: I expect you'll a bit of difficulty finding your way round at
first. Things will seem rather strange.
Inspector: very strange.
Mr. Brown: It must be quite a change coming from one of the under-
developed countries to our more advanced way of life.
Inspector: Oh yes.
Mr. Brown: Still, your people are doing remarkably well. Did you fly
here?
Inspector: Fly?
Mr. Brown: Fly! In a big iron bird. Quite a change from riding an
elephant. Unless you came by Jumbo. haha~ English joke.
Giovanni: Professori.
Mr. Brown: You should call me Sir.
Giovanni: Oh, I understand. You have been to get knotted.
Mr. Brown: come again?
Giovanni: To become a Sir! you got knotted by the queen.
Mr. Brown: The word is knighted! And I'm not that kind of Sir.
Mr. Brown: Taro.
Taro: Aso.
Mr. Brown: Su-lee
Su-lee: present.
Mr. Brown: Ali.
Ali: Gift!
Mr. Brown: Gift?
Ali: I'm surprising you, no? Each day I am learning new English
word.And I am finding that gift is another word for present.
Mr. Brown: Very ingenious.
Mr. Brown: I'd better take down your particulars, otherwise I may get
into hot water.
Ali: You are going to have a hot bath?
Mr. Brown: No, Ali. It's just another way of saying I may get into
trouble.
Ranjeet: Oh Dear. You have been committing some grievous
misdemeanour?
Mr. Brown: Not at all.
I do assure you that Mr. Brown will be severely dealt with.
Ali: Blimey you are dropping a clinker.
Mr. Brown: You mean clanger. (Drop a clanger= say sth wrong)
Ali: Yes pls.
Mind your language S1E3 A Fate worse than death
Ali: How about ajelly good shirt? Guaranteed one hundred percent
substandard.(Ali was supposed to say standard.)
Mr.Brown: Now, before we do anything else this evening, I want to
find a monitor. A monitor is a person who can take charge of the
class during my absent, somebody intelligent enough to assume
responsibility.
Mr.Brown: I'm going to ask you each to read a passage from the
newspaper. Then we'll discuss it together, OK? Max,You start.
Max: American Embassy bugged.
Mr.Brown: Good! Now dose anybody konw what that means?
Taro: It means American Embassy full of little insects.
Mr.Brown: No, Taro! They're not that sort of bugs! Listening devices.
Ali: You are putting some innocent lady in the pudding club. (in the
pudding club=pregnancy)
Ranjeet: I am up the creek without a puddle.
Mr. Brown: Paddle.
Ranjeet: This lady, is she resembling an elephant?
Miss Countney: I wouldn't exactly put it like that although she is
rather large.
Mr. Brown: Ask her to come along here.
Miss Countney: That's very irregular.
Mr. Brown: It is rather important.
Miss Countney: Very well,but don't make a habit of it.
Danielle: Prime minister sold a pup.
Mr. Brown: Good. Now that is a very good example of a figure of
speech. It dosen't mean what it says.
Su-lee: Typical of imperial poriticians who distort truth and suppress
working classes.
Mr. Brown: A figure of speech is a way of expressing an idea by way
of contrast or comparison. If you are being sold a pup or sold a
dummy, you are being cheated or deceived. In England, we use
figures of speech quite a lot. For example, we say as quick as
lightning, as light as a feather, as clean as a whistle. As blind as a
bat. As deaf as a ...Max?
Max: Postman.
Mr. Brown: No Max, Posts. Because posts can not hear. (As deaf as
a post)
Max: Neither can my postman.
Mr. Brown: Ali, as sly as a...
Ali: Sikh.
Mr. Brown: Fox. (As sly as a fox) as a mad as a ...Ranjeet?
Ranjeet: Muslim.
Mr. Brown: Hatter! (As mad as a hatter) Taro, as drunk as a ...
Taro: Newt.
Mr. Brown: Lord is more correct. (As drunk as a Lord) Jamila, as
white as...
Jamila: You.
Mr. Brown: Snow! Ali, as smooth as?
Ali: A baby's bottoms.
Mr. Brown: With all due respect, she was a couple on her own!
Giovanni: It's a sheer coincidence.
Mr. Brown: I thought she'd agreed to release you from the marriage
now.
Ranjeet: Yes, she has. But her farther is coming here to see you
about your marriage now.
Mr. Brown: Look, there's not going to be any wedding I've broken it
off. I've written to her parents, explaining that I couldn't possibly marry
their daughter. I pointed out the differences between our religious and
cultural backgrounds. And the fact I have no intention of marrying
anyone. He should've got the letter this morning.
Ranjeet: Oh yes, he did. That is why he is coming. He is hoping to
be slicing you into many pieces.
Mr. Brown: Pardon?
Ranjeet: He say you are bringing disgrace on his daughter.
Mind your language S1E5 The best things in life
Ali: I am coming up on the puddles. the football puddles.
Mr. Brown: The football pools.
Ranjeet: That is typical of that Muslim twit! No brains whatsoever.
Mr. Brown: Do you wish to cash a cheque?
Danielle: How much to post a letter?
Mr. Brown: Is it someone in England?
Danielle: No, no, it's a Swiss letter.
Mr. Brown: Well, it's more correct to say you want to send a letter to
Switzerland, not a Swiss letter. It could be very embarrassing if you
were writing to someboday in France. (French letter = condom)
Mr. Brown: Don't be ridiculous.
Juan: Pretending. Haha...
Mr. Brown: Pretand you have a cold.
Ranjeet: A cold what?
Mr. Brown: Alright, let's forget about the cold. just imagine your have
a pain.
Mr. Brown: There's obviously been some misunderstanding.I'll sort it
out with the police. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. Ali, I'll do
the talking, alright? you just leave it to me.
Police: Before you go sir, would u like to make a donation to our
Police charity fund?
Mr. Brown: Well as a matter of fact, you've caught me at a rather
awkaward moment.
Police: What about the five? You remember Sir, the one you thought
you never had. You know what they say, what you've never had you
never miss, unless you knew it was there all the time. In which case
it would come under bribery and corruption. You scratch my back
and I scratch yours.
Miss Countney: Well, untill Mr. Brown returns I shall take the class. I
shall ask you a few questions on general knowledge. Now first of all,
can anybody tell me who said "To be or not to be"?
Su-lee: Chairman Mao.
Miss Countney: It may come as a surprise to you, but other people
wrote things besides Chairman Mao.
Su-lee: He wrote everything.
Miss Countney: Are you not familiar with Shakespeare's works?
Miss Countney: Let me ask you a simple question. Can you tell me
how many P's there are in a pound?
Taro: Depend on size of peas.
Miss Countney: Now look, sir, it was obviously just been a
misunderstanding. I see no reason why we should pursue this any
further.
Police: What is your name?
Ali: Watt is not my name.
Police: I don't want to know what your name is not. What is your
name?
Ali: And I am telling you it is not.
Police: What is his name?
Ranjeet: Absolutely not.
Police: Not what?
Ranjeet: That is correct.
Police: What is your name?
Ranjeet: Wrong again.
Giovanni: He's not here.
Max: Yes.
Police:Who?
Max: Watt.
Police: Pardon?
Max: Who is not here and Watt is not here neither.
Police: You are all barmy.
Mr. Brown, if I promise not to proceed with this report, will you do me
a favour?
Mr. Brown: Yes, what is it?
Police: Take these crackpots out of here, and promise never to bring
them back. Even if they've commited a murder.
Miss Countney: Pls don't remind me of last night's unfortunate
incident. I hope you've explained to your Indian lady the difference
between Free and Free Offer.
Mind your language S1E6 Come back all is forgiven
Mr. Brown: If you want to argue argue in English.
Juan: Go back to Italy, you Italian spaghetti.
Giovanni: Your big Spanish omellette.
Giovanni: Maybe she's gonna give you the birthday present.
Mr. Brown: Yes and maybe the pope is getting married.
Giovanni: He is ? I never read that.
Mr. Brown: It was a joke.
Mr. Brown: would you all pay attention pls. I have sth rather important
to tell you. I'm afraid that Miss Countney has terminated my
engagement.
Ali: That is very big surprise to me.
Mr. Brown: Yes, it was a bit of a shock to me as well.
Ali: We are not knowing that you and Miss Countney were engaged.
Mr. Brown: You don't understand. I mean to coin a phrase I've been
given the boot. No Juan, can't you understand! I've been fired. I've
been given the bullet.
Giovanni: Santa Maria! She tried to shoot you?
Mr. Brown: No, I've been dismissed.
Giovanni: We have a strike.
Max: Yeah, let's have the strike.
Ranjeet: what is this strike? Does this mean we are going to be
fighting?
Giovanni: No, No, No. It's like a big onions.
Anna: What onions?
Giovanni: The trade onions.
Ali: Excuse me, I am thinking your strike not going to be working.
What we are needing is to be revolting.
Ranjeet: And I'm thinking you are already revolting. (revolting has
dislike meaning too.)
Miss Hardacre: I've come to drum English into your respective alien
heads.
Mind your language S1E7 The cheating game
Mind your language S1E13 The final exam
Ali:I am not going where I am looking.
Mr.Brown: No,no! I wasn't looking where I was going.
Ali: That makes the two of us!
Miss Countney: This is not unsatisfactory! This won't do at all.
I distinctly requested the Local Authority to send me a woman
teacher. Especially after the unfortunate incident involving Mr.
Warburton. I'm afraid he only lasted a month, then he departed.
Mr.Brown: Dead?
Miss Countney: Demented. Yes, the strain was too much for him.
Typical of the male sex! No stamina.
Mr.Brown: I'm Brown.
Ali: Oh no. You are committing a mistake.
Mr.Brown: Mistake?
Ali: Yes, you are not brown! We are brown! You are white.
Mr.Brown: My name is Brown! I'm your teacher.
Mr.Brown: What is your job?
Ranjeet: I'm a very important member of the British underground.
Mr.Brown: The underground what?
Ranjeet: Just the underground. Mind the doors.
Mr.Brown: Oh that underground.(=subway地铁)
Mr.Brown: Apart from one attempted murder and a possible race riot,
I think we're coping reasonably well.
Miss Countney: Well, we have one thing to be grateful for anyway.
Sex won't be rearing its ugly little head.
From past experience, it isn't race or religion that causes problems,
it's usually the presence of some foreign beauty. Jealousies,
intrigues, all sort of thing.
Giovanni: I never notice. You see its my eyes! I'm a little short
sighted. (And also a much big liar.) It's not true. Mr. Green.
Mr.Brown: The name is Brown.
Giovanni: You see! I'm a colour blind as well.
Ali: And you are asking for a kick up your big brown backside?
Su-lee: It is duty of every citizen to overthrow imperial warmongers.
So say Chairman Mao.
Mr. Brown: Ali. You are...
Ali: You are waiting for mu to speak an answer.
Mr. Brown: Well done.
Ali: Unfortunately, I am not understanding the question.
Mr. Brown: I want you to give me a sentence using 'You are...'
Ali: I am.
Mr. Brown: No, not 'I am', 'You are'! For example, you are from
Pakistan.
Ali: I am from Pakistan.
Mr. Brown: Yes, but now use 'You are'.
Ali: But I cannot say you are from Pakistan, because you are not, are
you?
Mr. Brown: Repeat after me. You are English.
Ali: No, I'm not! I'm from Pakistan. You are confusing me.
Ranjeet: You are stupid poof.
Ali: Don't you call me poof.
Ranjeet: Poof.
Miss Countney: Job getting you down already?
Mr. Brown: No, no, I'm fine! Never felt better. There's just one thing
rough. That window you nailed down! I think I ought to put a few more
nails in it.
Mind your language S1E2 An inspector calls
Juan: Por favor?
Miss Countney: Are you really as stupid as you look?
Juan: Por favor?
Mr. Brown: So we appear to be some missing, I hope they haven't
dropped out.
Ali: Please, it would notbe surprising me, I am always thinking that
Sikh, son of Guru, was a Punjabi drop out.(laugh at Ranjeet)
Ranjeet: I'm hearing what you are saying, you miserable spawn of a
jackal!
Mr. Brown: Don't you two start again! Actually, you are late.
Ranjeet: A thousand apologies for this unforgivalbe tardinees. But we
were all unavoidably detaained in the corridor by a lady...Sorry I forget
about her name. She was big lady, very large bosoms!
Su-lee: England is becoming more porriticarry minded, and gladually
more left wing.The overthrow of decadent capitaristic goverment will
soon take place. As working classes become more educated. And
embrace Communism as the true way of life. Workers revolution
getting nearer. With inevitabel collapse of Imperiaistic bougoise
intellectual society.
Mr. Brown: Yes! Well if thats what you like about England. I wouldn't
want to hear what you didn't like.
Taro: Excuse please. May I have small observations on young lady's
discourse, which will also irrustrate increased knowledge of English.
Young lady speak road of cobras!
Su-lee: Attitude typical of Fascist Nipponese!
Taro: Japan civilised country,not like China Ren by peasant.
Su-lee: Chinese not peasants!
Taro: Japanese not Fascist!.......I lose face, not my fault!
Mr. Brown: Never mind whose fault it was! Go and apologize!
Miss Countney: It has taken you 2 min 38 sec exactly to come to my
office immediately. I'm glad I didn't ask you to take your time.
Max: Danielle, what you do after class?
Danielle: I go back home to learn the English.
Giovanni: Hey, I'm going to learn English as well. Maybe we learn
together.
Danielle: Yes but what about poor Max?
Max: Yeah.
Giovanni: What about the poor Max? I'm crying my eyes out.
Danielle: I have an idea.
Giovanni: I have a lot of ideas.
Danielle: Why not you and Max study together?
Mr. Brown: I expect you'll a bit of difficulty finding your way round at
first. Things will seem rather strange.
Inspector: very strange.
Mr. Brown: It must be quite a change coming from one of the under-
developed countries to our more advanced way of life.
Inspector: Oh yes.
Mr. Brown: Still, your people are doing remarkably well. Did you fly
here?
Inspector: Fly?
Mr. Brown: Fly! In a big iron bird. Quite a change from riding an
elephant. Unless you came by Jumbo. haha~ English joke.
Giovanni: Professori.
Mr. Brown: You should call me Sir.
Giovanni: Oh, I understand. You have been to get knotted.
Mr. Brown: come again?
Giovanni: To become a Sir! you got knotted by the queen.
Mr. Brown: The word is knighted! And I'm not that kind of Sir.
Mr. Brown: Taro.
Taro: Aso.
Mr. Brown: Su-lee
Su-lee: present.
Mr. Brown: Ali.
Ali: Gift!
Mr. Brown: Gift?
Ali: I'm surprising you, no? Each day I am learning new English
word.And I am finding that gift is another word for present.
Mr. Brown: Very ingenious.
Mr. Brown: I'd better take down your particulars, otherwise I may get
into hot water.
Ali: You are going to have a hot bath?
Mr. Brown: No, Ali. It's just another way of saying I may get into
trouble.
Ranjeet: Oh Dear. You have been committing some grievous
misdemeanour?
Mr. Brown: Not at all.
I do assure you that Mr. Brown will be severely dealt with.
Ali: Blimey you are dropping a clinker.
Mr. Brown: You mean clanger. (Drop a clanger= say sth wrong)
Ali: Yes pls.
Mind your language S1E3 A Fate worse than death
Ali: How about ajelly good shirt? Guaranteed one hundred percent
substandard.(Ali was supposed to say standard.)
Mr.Brown: Now, before we do anything else this evening, I want to
find a monitor. A monitor is a person who can take charge of the
class during my absent, somebody intelligent enough to assume
responsibility.
Mr.Brown: I'm going to ask you each to read a passage from the
newspaper. Then we'll discuss it together, OK? Max,You start.
Max: American Embassy bugged.
Mr.Brown: Good! Now dose anybody konw what that means?
Taro: It means American Embassy full of little insects.
Mr.Brown: No, Taro! They're not that sort of bugs! Listening devices.
Ali: You are putting some innocent lady in the pudding club. (in the
pudding club=pregnancy)
Ranjeet: I am up the creek without a puddle.
Mr. Brown: Paddle.
Ranjeet: This lady, is she resembling an elephant?
Miss Countney: I wouldn't exactly put it like that although she is
rather large.
Mr. Brown: Ask her to come along here.
Miss Countney: That's very irregular.
Mr. Brown: It is rather important.
Miss Countney: Very well,but don't make a habit of it.
Danielle: Prime minister sold a pup.
Mr. Brown: Good. Now that is a very good example of a figure of
speech. It dosen't mean what it says.
Su-lee: Typical of imperial poriticians who distort truth and suppress
working classes.
Mr. Brown: A figure of speech is a way of expressing an idea by way
of contrast or comparison. If you are being sold a pup or sold a
dummy, you are being cheated or deceived. In England, we use
figures of speech quite a lot. For example, we say as quick as
lightning, as light as a feather, as clean as a whistle. As blind as a
bat. As deaf as a ...Max?
Max: Postman.
Mr. Brown: No Max, Posts. Because posts can not hear. (As deaf as
a post)
Max: Neither can my postman.
Mr. Brown: Ali, as sly as a...
Ali: Sikh.
Mr. Brown: Fox. (As sly as a fox) as a mad as a ...Ranjeet?
Ranjeet: Muslim.
Mr. Brown: Hatter! (As mad as a hatter) Taro, as drunk as a ...
Taro: Newt.
Mr. Brown: Lord is more correct. (As drunk as a Lord) Jamila, as
white as...
Jamila: You.
Mr. Brown: Snow! Ali, as smooth as?
Ali: A baby's bottoms.
Mr. Brown: With all due respect, she was a couple on her own!
Giovanni: It's a sheer coincidence.
Mr. Brown: I thought she'd agreed to release you from the marriage
now.
Ranjeet: Yes, she has. But her farther is coming here to see you
about your marriage now.
Mr. Brown: Look, there's not going to be any wedding I've broken it
off. I've written to her parents, explaining that I couldn't possibly marry
their daughter. I pointed out the differences between our religious and
cultural backgrounds. And the fact I have no intention of marrying
anyone. He should've got the letter this morning.
Ranjeet: Oh yes, he did. That is why he is coming. He is hoping to
be slicing you into many pieces.
Mr. Brown: Pardon?
Ranjeet: He say you are bringing disgrace on his daughter.
Mind your language S1E5 The best things in life
Ali: I am coming up on the puddles. the football puddles.
Mr. Brown: The football pools.
Ranjeet: That is typical of that Muslim twit! No brains whatsoever.
Mr. Brown: Do you wish to cash a cheque?
Danielle: How much to post a letter?
Mr. Brown: Is it someone in England?
Danielle: No, no, it's a Swiss letter.
Mr. Brown: Well, it's more correct to say you want to send a letter to
Switzerland, not a Swiss letter. It could be very embarrassing if you
were writing to someboday in France. (French letter = condom)
Mr. Brown: Don't be ridiculous.
Juan: Pretending. Haha...
Mr. Brown: Pretand you have a cold.
Ranjeet: A cold what?
Mr. Brown: Alright, let's forget about the cold. just imagine your have
a pain.
Mr. Brown: There's obviously been some misunderstanding.I'll sort it
out with the police. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. Ali, I'll do
the talking, alright? you just leave it to me.
Police: Before you go sir, would u like to make a donation to our
Police charity fund?
Mr. Brown: Well as a matter of fact, you've caught me at a rather
awkaward moment.
Police: What about the five? You remember Sir, the one you thought
you never had. You know what they say, what you've never had you
never miss, unless you knew it was there all the time. In which case
it would come under bribery and corruption. You scratch my back
and I scratch yours.
Miss Countney: Well, untill Mr. Brown returns I shall take the class. I
shall ask you a few questions on general knowledge. Now first of all,
can anybody tell me who said "To be or not to be"?
Su-lee: Chairman Mao.
Miss Countney: It may come as a surprise to you, but other people
wrote things besides Chairman Mao.
Su-lee: He wrote everything.
Miss Countney: Are you not familiar with Shakespeare's works?
Miss Countney: Let me ask you a simple question. Can you tell me
how many P's there are in a pound?
Taro: Depend on size of peas.
Miss Countney: Now look, sir, it was obviously just been a
misunderstanding. I see no reason why we should pursue this any
further.
Police: What is your name?
Ali: Watt is not my name.
Police: I don't want to know what your name is not. What is your
name?
Ali: And I am telling you it is not.
Police: What is his name?
Ranjeet: Absolutely not.
Police: Not what?
Ranjeet: That is correct.
Police: What is your name?
Ranjeet: Wrong again.
Giovanni: He's not here.
Max: Yes.
Police:Who?
Max: Watt.
Police: Pardon?
Max: Who is not here and Watt is not here neither.
Police: You are all barmy.
Mr. Brown, if I promise not to proceed with this report, will you do me
a favour?
Mr. Brown: Yes, what is it?
Police: Take these crackpots out of here, and promise never to bring
them back. Even if they've commited a murder.
Miss Countney: Pls don't remind me of last night's unfortunate
incident. I hope you've explained to your Indian lady the difference
between Free and Free Offer.
Mind your language S1E6 Come back all is forgiven
Mr. Brown: If you want to argue argue in English.
Juan: Go back to Italy, you Italian spaghetti.
Giovanni: Your big Spanish omellette.
Giovanni: Maybe she's gonna give you the birthday present.
Mr. Brown: Yes and maybe the pope is getting married.
Giovanni: He is ? I never read that.
Mr. Brown: It was a joke.
Mr. Brown: would you all pay attention pls. I have sth rather important
to tell you. I'm afraid that Miss Countney has terminated my
engagement.
Ali: That is very big surprise to me.
Mr. Brown: Yes, it was a bit of a shock to me as well.
Ali: We are not knowing that you and Miss Countney were engaged.
Mr. Brown: You don't understand. I mean to coin a phrase I've been
given the boot. No Juan, can't you understand! I've been fired. I've
been given the bullet.
Giovanni: Santa Maria! She tried to shoot you?
Mr. Brown: No, I've been dismissed.
Giovanni: We have a strike.
Max: Yeah, let's have the strike.
Ranjeet: what is this strike? Does this mean we are going to be
fighting?
Giovanni: No, No, No. It's like a big onions.
Anna: What onions?
Giovanni: The trade onions.
Ali: Excuse me, I am thinking your strike not going to be working.
What we are needing is to be revolting.
Ranjeet: And I'm thinking you are already revolting. (revolting has
dislike meaning too.)
Miss Hardacre: I've come to drum English into your respective alien
heads.
Mind your language S1E7 The cheating game
Mind your language S1E13 The final exam
4 ) 这是乌托邦吧！
“Mind your language”是1977年12月开播的英剧，讲述了英语老师Mr. Brown教英语不是母语的学生时发生的有趣故事。一共三季，我只看了前两季。放弃第三季是因为法国女生Danielle的发型变得非常难以描述，完全和女神设定搭不上边了，分分钟让人出戏。大家可以感受一下区别（图二是第三季的发型）。
看点：
虽然每个剧里的学生都来自不同的国度，有着不同的宗教信仰，但他们的热心和善良把彼此紧紧地联系在了一起。现在看来这是乌托邦般的世界吧。如果现在世界的各个种族不那么相互针对，就不会有那么多的纷争了吧。
剧里每个人物性格都刻画得很有趣。很多人物都有自己的口头禅：西班牙人Juan的口头禅是：“Por favor"（please的意思）；印度锡克人Ranjeet总说"a thousand apologies"；巴基斯坦人Ali喜欢说"Squeeze me please" (他想说的是 "Excuse me please")；匈牙利人Zoltán常说"Bocsánat?" (意思是 "sorry" 或 "excuse me")。
饰演餐厅收银员Gladys的演员在剧里总感觉透着和身份不搭的精致贵族气质（图三）。
缺点：
剧里来自不同国家学生的想法和行为基本和英国人对他们的固有印象一致。在种族问题日渐严重的现在应该不会再出现这样的剧了。
这部剧在非常搞笑的同时，也展示了当老师的不易。推荐大家在觉得生活不易或埋怨老师的时候去看看这部剧～
* 我的微博（aka爱读书的丸子）上有更多电影/电视剧推荐，欢迎大家关注！
5 ) 恰好碰到
虽然这个片子很古老，上世纪70年代的老剧，但在Mr. Brown的带领下，各个学生存在感满满。。。。Ali是印度人，他的英语倒是能听懂，把Oh Blimey, jelly good天天挂在嘴边，经常和巴基斯坦、口头禅是Thousand apologies的Ranjeet争吵，经常为宗教原因大打出手。。。。Giovanni和Max是一对好基友，虽然争着向Danielle献殷勤，但是课后依然勾肩搭背，其中Santa Maria是人高腿长的希腊小伙的口头禅。。。Taro来自日本，习惯每次说话前鞠躬；Jamila是整天针织不离手的印度家庭妇女；Anna是严肃正经的德国人，会在别人不正经的时候肘击对方，但对大家都跟热情友好；Juan是西班牙大胡子，经常说Por Favor和老师装糊涂；SuLee是整天大段大段背毛主席语录的中国红卫兵形象。。。
6 ) 很温暖的一部喜剧
这真的是一部非常优秀的情景喜剧，尽管已经是非常老的剧了，但是感觉比现在的一些情景喜剧还好看得多。
温柔又和蔼的Mr. Brown真的是太可爱了，对着这么一群状况百出的外国学生们还能这么有耐心，真的是及其的抗打击啊，怪不得大家都那么喜欢他。当然，能犯出各种有创意的错误的同学们也都很可爱，
看完感觉这个班级像一个大家庭，平时有时候会有争吵，但有事的时候每个人都会互相关心相互帮助，真的是很美好的感觉啊！
温柔又和蔼的Mr. Brown真的是太可爱了，对着这么一群状况百出的外国学生们还能这么有耐心，真的是及其的抗打击啊，怪不得大家都那么喜欢他。当然，能犯出各种有创意的错误的同学们也都很可爱，
看完感觉这个班级像一个大家庭，平时有时候会有争吵，但有事的时候每个人都会互相关心相互帮助，真的是很美好的感觉啊！
今年好像没看什么英剧，补个口音梗。第一季七分吧。各种老外一屋欢，众口难调路远艰。人物脸谱化，更糟糕是种族梗和性别梗都比较受限。还有，高压校长的人设简直是在影射撒切尔夫人嘛。选择不因人而感。随便看看，顺便做点笔记。
看完都忘记怎么说英语了233好！看！谐音梗，口音梗，宗教梗，种族梗，政治梗，1977年的剧，放到现在依然经典。又萌又逗，学会了一句西语，超喜欢西班牙大叔讲冷笑话XD看了男主演员简介，心酸，命运坎坷，生不逢时，这样的才华和颜值放现在得多受欢迎？君生我未生，愿你天堂过得开心不孤单
看完之后,开始喜欢:笑嘻嘻的说blimey, 笑嘻嘻的双手合十摇摇头说a thousand apologies, 笑嘻嘻的一摊手说por favor，一脸天真的说santa maria！！
仅以无数次笑声，献给伟大的情景剧演员Barry Evans。愿天堂如课堂温暖，永不孤独。
Barry Evans讓我想起誰呢？ | 早生了四十年啊barry
Mr.Brown现实生活居然这么凄凉。。。真悲伤。。。
虽然通篇都是关于外国人的刻板印象这么似乎政治不正确的话题，但大概也只有英剧做得到拍出来不让人觉得侮辱低俗，并且不落俗套
好萌好有爱。又让我想起短暂的教师时光
Por favor.
神剧。英式幽默合集。人物虽脸谱化，但都太他妈典型了。
很久没看过这么好笑的情景喜剧了，语言笑料不会随着时间流逝而失去效力。帅气亲和耐心十足有风度的Mr.Brown怎能让人不爱呢，对学生一脸无奈时的表情可爱死了。
日不落帝国的梦。por favor？
Ali:I was looking where I am going.Mr.Brown:I wasn't looking where I was going.悼念Barry Evans，同时悼念《是，首相/大臣》中Hacker、Humphrey的演员。
妈妈再也不用担心我的印度英语了！
仿佛一下子英语提升了好多，而且学会了好多其他外语。。哈哈哈哈哈哈哈，虽然笑点有些刻板，不过看下来真是好快乐，每个人都这么傻傻的好可爱。Françoise Pascal 头几集觉得特别臭美，到后面越来越好玩；Barry Evans 生平真的好凄惨，嘤嘤嘤~~ 谢谢花花❤
充分利用语言梗、俚语梗、文化差异，制造笑点，雅而不俗，颇有会心之意，典型英式幽默；70年代的情景肥皂剧就如此强大了，室内戏自有一种温馨的家庭氛围；Mr.Brown超萌，对比真实身世更唏嘘；学生各个富有特色，唱得一出好戏。
西班牙叔叔讲笑话那段为什么那么好笑我笑了五分钟……
Por favor? Blimey! A thousand apologies! Ah so.Santa Maria!1977年冷战背景下能有这种世界各族人民和谐共处的剧，不得不佩服。有人会批评它的刻板印象，可是刻板印象并没有什么事实上的错误。这样的剧以前是不是就这一部不知道，但以后不会再有（拍出来会被白左喷种族歧视、被小粉红喷抹黑天朝）。
看老剧最让人难受的不是渣画质 不是糙布景 是喜欢上某个温暖帅气的演员时发现他已经不在了。
老毛你把素丽招了做秘书吧。